Long time no see.
You know what sucks the most from still living at home with your parents? The anxiety. My God, it's awful.
Any teenager knows how it feels. It's the worst feeling in the entire world. Well okay, maybe not every teenager. Some teenagers are graced with everything they could ever want, but for the lucky fellers like me, hah, yeah that ain't gonna happen.
So anxiety, yeah, it sucks real bad. I get it over anything and everything. I worry constantly and wonder when I will ever get to the point in my life where I can be free.
I know, I'm not even 21 and I'm talking about being free. But I'm not your average 20-year-old. I seriously want my own house in the next few years and to have my life on the right path.
No, I'm not in college. Nothing about college even tempts me. Yeah, you go to school for four to five years and then get stuck with a 9-5 job for the rest of your life. Doesn't that just sound dandy?
And no, I'm not sitting around and just wishing for my life to go right. I know what I want to do with my life, but it's just a matter of when will it happen? I've known since I was 14 that I wanted to be an author. While everyone else my age went out and partied and drank, I sat at home and worked my ass off trying to write books. And so far, I've written two. Hopefully I find the right agent who wants my books, but you just never know.
So right now I feel like I'm just watching my life fly by. Everyone else is having a great ol' time, and I'm sitting here like this picture of Castiel:
And another frustrating thing is being in a relationship for almost seven years, but it's hard to live together when money isn't an easy thing for 20-year-olds.
Parents don't understand that one bit, especially when way back in the day, you only needed one paycheck and not two to survive. Does that piss off anyone else?
And all I can think to myself is, how on earth do people expect teenagers to act so prim and proper when the world seems like its out to get us?
No wonder so many teenagers grow up with anxiety, depression, and eating disorders.
I'm one of them. It's not fun.
All I can hope for is that this hell I'm enduring will help pave me to an awesome future. I mean, why not? Why shouldn't I have a great future. It's the only thing I can hope for.
So for any other teenager out there dealing with anxiety and whatnot, keep your chin up. There has to be more for us out there.
I just know it.